Friendship Revisited

151. Somewhere along the line to becoming an adult, I lost track of my best friends from high school. Oh, I knew where they were and what courses they were taking in college, but since I usually don't text unless texted to and was so busy with my own world and blossoming love life, my barkada somehow became distant. It became so rare to see them that get-togethers boiled down to only once or twice a year. My girls also had their own lives to live, I was aware of that. I missed them and would often wonder how they were doing. You filled that void  and I am ever so grateful for it. Though you didn't start out as best friend material, our closeness and your determination eventually paved the way for us becoming true friends. I guess I became one of those lucky few who gets to have their boyfriend and bestfriend rolled into a single person. When my girls ask me out, even though I know that I don't need your permission to do so, I still ask you. You just tell me to have fun and to be careful. When I encourage you to bond with your own barkada, you shake your head and reassure me that you're fine without them and that you'll only be wasting your money. Still I encouraged you because I knew that you missed them too. Every time I see my girls it always seems that although we have indeed become distant on some level, a part of my heart, my young high school self, beats anew in our renewed bonds. These women were my family, thus a part of me, and no matter where I went, we would always certainly remain friends. I don't even have to think so much of it. When I reflect on how different our set of friends are, it still amazes me of how complicated yours seem to be; how awkward the relationships within them are. Boyfriend-girlfriend speaking. Perhaps that's another reason why you are reluctant to see them. Frankly, I don't know how a friendship like that survives after a disaster. I really don't think it can be salvaged after being torn apart like that. But I don't like dwelling on the past because what matters is now. We would always have our memories with our friends, and our lingering fondness for one another no matter the time and place. If the friendship is true, then it remains until we're old and grey. You've become singularly the most important person in my life. The one whose name I've carved in my heart and the one I've chosen to hold my hand when it's time to finally go home. My lover and my best friend. I am glad you are here.