Five Hours

16. In previous blog entries, I have mentioned some of our problems with each other. Issues, such as jealousy, that causes much friction in our relationship. People, even those closest to us, sometimes don't even notice that we are having problems. We don't want them to and they wouldn't truly understand anyway. I'm the kind of girl, always have been, that kind of girl who cries a lot because of her problems and runs to others for comfort. I wanted to run to you, you know, but how can I when sometimes you are the root cause of my problem? So I sought companionship and advice from my friends. To me, there was nothing wrong with it. For you, it was dead wrong if those friends were guys. You were so paranoid that other men were taking me away from you, your source of happiness and emotional outlet, your girl. You just didn't understand how at times I needed  man's point of view to sort things out. I love you. I hate you. I must be stupid for falling for the person I hate. There was a point that I couldn't take it any more, and you were being so unreasonable. So around 1 AM, I broke up with you over the phone. We were hardly together a year when that happened, and I was so uncontrollably emotional at that time. Perhaps you didn't mean to be so mean and uncompromising. And perhaps I didn't mean to be so impulsive. Tears flowing, that night I slept a listless, dreamless, fatigued sleep. It was the worst feeling ever. When I awoke I was staring at your face. My first reaction was shock. How and when did you get here in my room? You can't see me like this, my eyes so puffy and the rest of my face equally messed up. You held me ever so gently, and told me that you were sorry and that you couldn't let me go. And that you loved me. And that I was so important, so precious to you. Don't... leave me. Those words. They broke my heart. I took you back in a heartbeat because I felt the same way. And I hugged you as tightly as I could,  the tears flowed all over again, only this time with joy. Then we joined my family for breakfast. It's funny being on an emotional rollercoaster with you. You can break me and fix me. How in just five hours, you made my crumbling world something more beautiful once again.